{"id":120,"date":"2024-10-01T14:49:20","date_gmt":"2024-10-01T14:49:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dryadsystems.com\/wordpress\/?p=120"},"modified":"2024-10-01T14:49:20","modified_gmt":"2024-10-01T14:49:20","slug":"the-conversation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dryadsystems.com\/wordpress\/2024\/10\/01\/the-conversation\/","title":{"rendered":"The Conversation"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I wrote this short story in college a few years ago.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Conversation<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou\u2019re running late.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

James looked just as relaxed as he always did as he sat at the same corner table he shared most days with Jess. He knew the thirty something year old woman wouldn\u2019t mind his pointing out the obvious to his friend.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI had to talk to Professor Smith for a minute\u201d the woman answered.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cTrouble?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cNo, not really. I just felt there was a question on the quiz we took that wasn\u2019t really worded right. I get that classes need to teach to the mainstream, but sometimes I wish teachers would remember that not everyone is cishet\u201d the woman replied.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOh, sorry. You ready for spring break?\u201d James asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The sun was shining through the cafeteria window at his back. A small bead of perspiration was beginning to gather on his left temple, though one might argue as to whether those two facts were related. The man had hardly touched his tray of food, knowing today was going to be anything but typical.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI have one paper I need to write, but other than that I\u2019m ready.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAnything interesting?\u201d James continued.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cA brief summary of Rogerian Psychology.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

James liked the woman he shared his lunch hour with. Some days, she was the only reason he bothered coming to the college. She was his best friend, after all. They had met some three years prior, at a party thrown by someone neither really knew that well. Of course, Jess\u2019s name was different back then, though he forced himself to not think about what it had been. Over the next few months, the two became friends, but then the woman\u2019s life went in a different direction. He was the first person Jess came out to. James was so proud of her for taking control of her life and encouraged her by standing next to her every day, sometimes as her friend, sometimes as her over-protective brother, and sometimes just as that someone she could always get a hug from when she needed one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI\u2019m going fishing on the coast for a few days. Nag\u2019s head, maybe, but I haven\u2019t decided\u201d the man continued.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThat sounds fun.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

James felt the butterflies in his stomach in an instant. Things were going too perfectly, and that was starting to make him worry. Still, he was a bit scared, though his mind wasn\u2019t really sure of what.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou still like to fish, don\u2019t you?\u201d James asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The question made him begin to shake ever so slightly. Frantically, he poked at a piece of carrot cake in the corner of his tray, knowing the activity would ensure Jess wouldn\u2019t notice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI love to fish, but I\u2019ve never\u2026 I mean since transition\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWell, first of all, it\u2019s spring, not summer, so you probably won\u2019t be wearing a swimsuit.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

James\u2019 tone retreated to his safe place, one of sarcasm. He knew all the pieces of the chess game he was playing were in place, and the time to commit was at hand. But the game, he well knew, could be won or loss in a single move.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhere would we stay? I\u2019m not sleeping in the car.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The man could feel his heartbeat suddenly increase in tempo. His friend had done for him what he was trying to figure out how to do himself, invite the woman on the trip.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt\u2019s the off season, so rooms are pretty cheap right now. You wouldn\u2019t even have to pay, since I\u2019m going either way.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Time suddenly stood still. James had all but showed the woman all his cards. He was unaware of his left leg as it started bouncing off the floor. Every word he had spoken in the last few minutes suddenly rushed through his mind as he tried to decide if and when he had made a fatal mistake.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cUm, we\u2019ve been best friends for a long time, but\u2026 is there something I\u2019m missing here?\u201d Jess asked moments later.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the few years prior to that moment, the two of them had spent a lot of time together, but always in activities that were clearly those of friends, but no more. James had always been the best friend he knew how to be to the woman, but there were times when his support of her seemed like rhetoric as much as anything. In life, however, there are times when rhetoric and truth come face to face. James knew that this was one of those times. His heart braced for what would come next, knowing he had come to the edge of the abyss of his own self-doubt. He had to make a choice, and he had to make it with the next words out of his mouth.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSo\u2026 I thought it would be a nice way to ask you to be my girlfriend.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

His heart raced. He could feel the heat as his cheeks undoubtedly turned red. The man felt as though he might pass out as his breathing grew shallow and his stomach turned knots. The decision to be honest was perhaps the most difficult he had ever made, though he felt guilty for feeling that way. Jess was a woman, in spite of what his memories sometimes told him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There was a long silence at the table as Jess poked awkwardly at a cherry tomato that seemed to dislike the prospect of being pierced by her fork. The fact that her hand was trembling added to the difficulty of her task. Jess had not thought about her friend that way, but then again, she hadn\u2019t thought about anyone that way. Her life just seemed easier if she ignored that portion of her life. She knew other transgender women who seemed mired in a cycle of want and rejection, and she had always opted to just avoid the whole awkward situation. But now, in the cafeteria lunchroom, words her soul longed to hear were waiting for her reply.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAre you sure?\u201d she asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

She was careful to not lift her eyes from her tray. Jess knew that if she made eye contact, the tears welling up in her eyes would begin to roll down her cheeks. If she had learned nothing else about womanhood in the past few years, it was that tears and makeup don\u2019t mix. Still, the moment was real, her feelings were real, and what was happening was real.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cJess, I have a confession to make. I\u2019ve always accepted you for who you say you are, but maybe that hasn\u2019t been as true as it should be. You\u2019re pretty, you\u2019re smart, and you\u2019re a wonderful human being. I can\u2019t stop thinking about you. There are a few things we probably would have to work out, but just a few. I just know there isn\u2019t another person in the entire world I could see myself growing old with. Forgive me for taking so long to see that\u201d came James\u2019 reply.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cDo you really mean that?\u201d the woman asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For the first time in several long moments, the woman lifted her eyes from her tray to make eye contact with her companion. The tears came, but there was a look of determination on the woman\u2019s face. Only then did she notice a table with three women next to them had been listening in on their conversation. Rather than feeling annoyed, she garnered strength from them, as though they were a jury before which facts were being determined.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

James stood up and looked around the room for a long moment, panning the room full of their peers. With a deep breath, he decided on the way he would communicate his answer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cKiss me.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A long moment later, Jess noticed the three girls at the table next to theirs were wiping gently at the corner of their eyes. The verdict was in. The facts were established. The new couple never did finish their lunch. Hand in hand, they left the cafeteria, knowing the both were changed from who they were moments before.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I wrote this short story in college a few years ago. The Conversation \u201cYou\u2019re running late.\u201d James looked just as relaxed as he always did as he sat at the same corner table he shared most days with Jess. He knew the thirty something year old woman wouldn\u2019t mind his pointing out the obvious to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-120","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dryadsystems.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/120","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dryadsystems.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dryadsystems.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dryadsystems.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dryadsystems.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=120"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/dryadsystems.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/120\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":121,"href":"https:\/\/dryadsystems.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/120\/revisions\/121"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dryadsystems.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=120"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dryadsystems.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=120"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dryadsystems.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=120"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}